Building your marriage on the right foundation
Looking around, we see so many marriages failing to thrive. Many have been hurt or betrayed. Others are just wondering what happened to their loving feeling and are living more as roommates than as lovers and life partners.
This is not how God designed marriage to be. He created marriage to be a picture of love. Of His love for us. Of Christ’s love for His church.
My heart longs to see these marriages get better because I know that better is possible. A healthy marriage needs the right foundation, but it’s never too late to rebuild.
No matter how much you love your spouse, marriage can be challenging. Sometimes we have false expectations because while we are dating all we see is that really cute guy that makes us laugh and gives us the warm and fuzzy feeling. We want to see him every day, talk to him about everything, and we can’t wait to spend the rest of our lives together in wedded bliss.
The reality is it takes a lot of work to make and keep a marriage strong and healthy.
Juggling jobs, kids, extended families, housework, finances – it can sometimes really destroy that warm and fuzzy feeling.
On the other hand, it can be absolutely amazing when you learn how to thrive as a couple. When you work together as a team, trust each other with your life, get to know the other person almost better than they know themselves, and get to spend every day with your very best friend. That is the goal!
How do you get that kind of marriage? The key is to build your marriage on the right foundation. That foundation is Jesus Christ.
Each of you must intentionally seek God first and surrender your marriage to Him.
When both you and your spouse each seek to grow closer to the Lord on their own, you will automatically grow closer to each other as you both live the way God tells us to do and love each other the way God commands us to love. Each of you should spend time daily in prayer and reading God’s Word. Strive to learn more about God and how to live in a way that glorifies Him. When that becomes your goal, the rest really will fall into place.
Remember, when you get married, each of you marries a sinner. We can’t escape that. We all need and have received Jesus’ forgiveness and grace. We must remember that we are also to extend that same forgiveness and grace to our spouse.
Our marriage would not be what it is without the grace of God. I know that because I know who I was without Christ. I know who I am apart from Christ. I know my sinful nature and my selfish ways. I know that I’m not strong enough to do it on my own.
But by the grace of God, and by making Him the center of our lives – individually and as a couple – Rob and I can cling tightly together, never letting go, even in the darkest storms. When we remember that we ourselves are not perfect, it makes it easier to accept our spouse’s quirks and faults.
When we make Christ the 3rd strand of our marriage, He holds us together like the 3rd strand of a rope holds the rope together. If we are committed to inviting God into our lives and seeking Him daily, then our marriage will thrive as a result.
“Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” (Ecc 4:12)
